English Essay 两篇范文- Finding what you have lost&Giving ad

English Essay 两篇范文- Finding what you have lost&Giving advice about health,由留学生essay指导中心提供，帮助你更好的写作英语essay。
English Essay 1: Finding what you have lost

I am an e(C)(>>E)ngineer, job folder is very important for my work. When I work in (AR)(>>a)laboratory, I always keep the folder in my hand, I can write down anything that I find during (AR)(>>the)experiments. It is convenitent(SP)(>>convenient) for me.

I lost my (D)(>>)one of my folders yesterday. It was just missing. I looked for it in my office and laboratory, I asked everyone, I couldn't find it out. (I(x))(>>WORD LIMIT)I prepared another folder today, all files had been re-written. I spent nearly whole day to re-do the experiments because all data were lost with the folder.

I finished all before getting off work finally. I went to the meeting room to have a cup of coffee to relax. Oh my God! My lost folder lies on the table. I thought about it, I had a short meeting with one client in this meetng room yesterday and I put my folder on the table. I forgot to bring it back after I said goodbye to my client!

Now I have two folders for one case.

Overall Teacher Comments

Dear student, Thank you for your very interesting submission, it was a pleasure to read.You need to work on word limit,capitalisation,and spelling.Instead of writing "I lost my one of my folders" you can write it as "I lost one of my folders".A definite article such as "the" is used to refer to a specific instance of the noun, often already mentioned in the context or easy to identify. "Use an before words beginning with vowels or when a consonant initial has a vowel sound.All proper nouns like the names of people, places, profession, nationality, days, months, etc, need to be capitalized.The pronoun 'I' always needs to be capitalized.Word limits are prescribed not to make it difficult for the student but to enable him to write better and improve at every level, in order to enhance his vocabulary and writing skills. So please give importance to the word limit and send another writing for uation, pertaining to the word limit. Good luck- Tricy_I

English Essay 2: Giving advice about health

Are you still on a diet to reduce some weight? I gained some weight recently. I have been taking exercises to lose weight from day to day. Jogging is a healthy form of exercise. I love Yoga (C)(>>yoga )more. I spend one hour on it every day. I found that Yoga is the best way to cure backache and a good discipline to help your body to relax.

I think you should sleep early, don't go to the bars so often and don't drink so much. Healthy food can help your body keeping energetic. Oh, my dear sister, why not try?

Overall Teacher Comments
Dear Yannie, thank you for your submission. I think that you have written the health advice nicely here. However, you really need to try and stick to the word limit. You only needed to write 50-70 words. You need to revise your capitalization in: Yoga (C)(>>yoga ), use small letter as it is a common noun now. I have read through and there are no more corrections that I need to make. You have obviously put in a lot of effort and have edited your work before submitting it. I look forward to reading your writing again in the future. Keep up the good work.
............................................................................................
 

I went to see a great concert last night. The best play in this concert is (VT)(>>was)Wolfgan Amadeus Mozart's Serenade. Mozart's music is very romantic, the theme is simple, but it's bright and cheerful. The last cheerful rondo has all the brilliance of an operatic finale, it's so amazing.

Do you want to see a concert with me? We can enjoy together.

Overall Teacher Comments
Dear Student, You did a great job in describing about entertainment, as it was clearly written and easily understood. You did well in keeping your writing simple and short. Check out the proper usage of the essentials like verb tenses to gain better grades as you progress. Please review my corrections and work on them. Good luck with future assignments - Alan.

............................................................................................

I am very glad that I have a chance to travell(SP)(>>travel) around Beijing for free (I(x))(>>of cost). My travelling plan is as follows:

Firstly, I'm going to take a plane to Beijing airport. I'll visit [[Tian An Men ]] (AR)(>>the)[(WC)(>>Tiananmen)]Square, (AR)(>>the)drum-tower and some famous alleies(WC)(>>alley) on(AR)(>>the) first day. On second day I'll go to Qinghua(PU)(>>,)and(D)(>>)(AR)(>>the) Beijing university to visit my friends. I'll go(PR)(>>for) shopping with my friends in Wangfujing street after supper.

Then I'll visit the Great Wall. The Bird's Nest and the Water Cube are my final destinations on the fourth day.

Overall Teacher Comments
Dear student, A well written and thought out response to the topic at hand. You were able to express yourself clearly and confidently in an amusing manner.You have a good sense of humour and it is wonderful to read your writing! You have made great use of simple sentence structures.You did very well , showing that you have spent a lot of time reading.Review my corrections,A definite article (the) is used before singular and plural nouns that refer to a particular member of a group. Spellings can ruin any writing, so take care of them. Use appropriate words that can be used in the context.Use preposition "for" is used to indicate a destination eg: " I'll go(PR)(>>for) shopping ".

.........................................................................................................................................................

I think all colleagues should wear appropriate clothes at work. Dark, grey or elegant dark suits are better choice. Shirts and T-shirts with collar are acceptable. Short skirts, sleeveless tops, plunging necklines, or sports wears are not permitted. We wear casual dress only on every Friday if (I(x))(>>there is )no formal activity.

Overall Teacher Comments
Dear student, Thank you for your very interesting submission; it was a pleasure to read. Your writing follows a clear and easy progression. Instead of writing,"We wear casual dress only on every Friday if no formal activity", you can write it as ,"We wear casual dress only on every Friday if there is no formal activity". Please use the Englishtown Grammar Guide and Grammar Lab to help you. Overall a good piece of writing. Review my corrections and keep trying. Practice makes perfect. Good luck-Shirley.